More fun in Theme Park World

Today, I took my friend Marjorie to Dollywood, and we had a blast. Marjorie is 65, a grad student studying Storytelling, known all over Michigan as Mother Goose (complete with costume), and quite enamored with the notion of retiring to East Tennessee.

We got a late start, so we didn't make it to the Apple Store in Knoxville, but went straight to Pigeon Forge. On the way, I discovered that not only had Marjorie not been to Dollywood, but she'd never been to the area at all. So after taking my shortcut from Sevierville all the way around Pigeon Forge, we headed up through Gatlinburg and into the National Park. It was a misty, misty morning, so the views were pretty limited, but the Park itself is glorious no matter what the weather. Turns out Marjorie is a kayaker! We came back around and considered having lunch at Pancake Pantry, but for some reason, Gatlinburg was absolutely packed, so we hit the bypass and headed to the Theme Park, which was really only about half full. After picking up a Q-bot and reserving a show, we started looking for lunch, and, of course, ended up at the Giant Delicious Super Wonderful Hot Dog stand. I wasn't sure if Marjorie was a Ride Person, but after taking one look at the Thunderhead, she said, "Well, I've GOT to ride THAT!" We pretty much walked on, and had a nice chat with a ride attendant who asked me about the Voyage since she noticed my Holiday World t-shirt. She asked if it was really a better coaster than the Thunderhead, and I told her "I hate to say it, but yes." We chatted a bit about Holiday World- the ride operator said she really wants to go check it out. She said she thought the reason Holiday World beats out Dollywood was because of the free sodas. I said, "May be." What I wanted to say was that it's the free sodas, the ticket price that's $20 less, the included water park, and the fact that it's so clean you could lick the sidewalk if you wanted to. I wanted to say, quite honestly, that it's just a better park. As much as I love Dollywood, Holiday World really is just a better park. What I did say was that the two are similar in a lot of respects, and that Dollywood is the only park I would compare with Holiday World.

Anyway, Marjorie had a GREAT time on the Thunderhead, and yelled her head off. She told me she hadn't been on a ride of any sort in about 15 years, and I said that she couldn't have picked a better one to start back up on. So it was drizzly and chilly. The Timber Tower wasn't running in the morning, and Mystery Mine was a bit much for her- I made sure she knew about the 2 93-degree drops before she even considered riding it. We headed up to River Battle- and since it was rainish and chilly, no one was riding- except one lone family: Mom and Dad and a little girl. I made sure to blast them with a water cannon, and they sprayed me right back. Big smiles all around. On around to Blazing Fury, which had a 10 minute or so wait. Behind us in line were two little girls, so excited about the ride that they were talking excitedly to strangers (us) about it. "We've been on it six times in a row! After five, we said only one more but we have to do it again and THEN we won't ride it again and I love Blazing Fury and Mom bought me a necklace and do you like the Thunderhead and I like it when Molly says she's going to jump and Luther says he has a bad back!"

We caught a few minutes of the Zambian Vocal Group show, discovered that the Dollywood Express wasn't running today, and caught a show of Heartsong, one of my favorite things in the park- a multimedia paean to Dolly's love of the Smokies. It's really well done and emotionally manipulative, and gets me a little choked up every damn time. Marjorie loved it, of course. Then the 65-year-old grandma and I hopped on the Dizzy Disk, had dinner at Aunt Grannie's (and the sky opened up and it poured for the rest of the day), then saw the Russian National Theatre show (which is much better this year than last year). At one point four of the women came into the audience, picked out male partners, and had them dance onstage. One poor guy, a big guy in his early twenties, really experienced some Plumber's Crack Showing every time he bent over. The audience giggled, and I thought, "Oh, Lord, his family will be talking about that at Thanksgiving and Christmas for years." "Remember that time at Dollywood when you showed your ass to the whole audience?!?!?!"

After that, we hit the Chasing Rainbows museum, and saw the Coat of Many Colors, which Marjorie hadn't realized was REAL, and she announced she could spend all day in there studying the construction of Dolly's costumes. And then we headed home. It was a really nice time with someone who is pretty darn cool, and she really loved the park. She decided that a trip to a theme park is a NECESSITY when you're in the middle of a really stressful time- like during the crunch at the end of a semester at grad school.

So that was my fun, wonderful, quite low-key day. It might have been better had the weather been a little more cooperative, but it didn't stop us from having fun, and probably helped, since we had no push to make the water rides, which meant a more leisurely stroll around the park and not having to find time to fit them in.

One other thing stands out. We went into a woodcarving shop I'd never been into before, and they have the most wonderful custom-carved mantles for over fireplaces. They're carved and painted with thin paint or stain, just lovely. They start at $800, and if I were in a house I was planning on settling in, I'd absolutely find a way to get one. Most were plain rectangles, with scenes carved in bas-relief. One was a mountain scene with a peaceful little cabin. The carver told us that if you ordered one, you could give him a photo of your house, and he'd replace the cabin with YOUR HOUSE! Isn't that great? And there was one that was not bas-relief, but full 3-D, from the top and the front, of a stream, complete with trout, and pebbles, and a life-sized raccoon on top of the mantle reaching into the stream. It was spectacular. The same shop had a coffee table, and the top was about 4 inches deep- a 3-D stream bed, as though looking down into the stream, with fish, a turtle, and even a discarded fishing reel, all covered by a plate of glass. While it wasn't they style of a place I would probably furnish, it was absolutely lovely. And at $799 (more than I would ever pay for a coffee table), it was much less expensive than I had expected. I'm sure they could sell it for $1200 and still find buyers.

So that was today at Dollywood with a friend. Next weekend, if I have my schoolwork done, I may actually head back, since Dolly herself will be touring the park. Another friend wants to go. While three weekends in a ROW at Dollywood is probably overkill, I do love to get my money's worth for that season pass, and I sure would love to have Dolly wave at me as she passes in the parade. Kinda like the Pope, you know, but very, very different. :)